


Weakness, not this time

by kmbers



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-09 10:35:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4345253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmbers/pseuds/kmbers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On the outside she looked menacing, however on the inside she was broken. Clarke knew this. Lexa knew Clarke knew this. And that is what terrified the Commander more than any sword wielded by the strongest warrior.</p><p>Or, what if Clarke didn't leave when Lexa told her to ;)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is the introduction to something I've been working on.. I may or may not finish it in the future, we'll see.  
> Hopefully it's not too terrible.  
> Also rated Teen for now, will probably go to Explicit later on if I choose to carry on with this.

“GET. OUT.” Lexa’s words came through clenched teeth and a strained jaw. On the outside she looked menacing, however on the inside she was broken. Clarke knew this. Lexa knew Clarke knew this. And that is what terrified the Commander more than any sword wielded by the strongest warrior. She felt exposed, in such a way that she had never felt since Costia. She had vowed to never show this side of herself to anyone ever again. Weakness.

Clarke searched Lexa’s face. She was desperate to lock contact between the Commanders green eyes and her own blue, and once she did, she knew Lexa’s eyes held the answer to all of her questions. 

The sky girl let herself acknowledge the pang in her chest for a moment at the realisation of what Lexa has had to endure in her short life. The Commander and the sky girl were much the same. However in this moment Clarke could see just how much being Heda had drained Lexa. In this small moment she could see a mirror of her own responsibilities. Her duty to protect hundreds of people.

As Clarke fought to regain her composure she knew then and there that she was not going to back down. There was no way she was going to let Lexa order her around just to be able to rebuild her walls. Not this time, she thought to herself.

Clarke simultaneously felt and heard Lexa gasp as she took a decisive step forward, pressing her body flush to the Commanders. There was barely enough room to breathe between them and sky girl knew that Lexa could snap at any moment due to the direct disobedience of orders to leave. However, Clarke was not ready to give up yet, and she trusted Lexa with every fibre of her being. She would ignore her head today, and go with her heart. Love was not weakness. Not today.

“Cut the shit Lexa, you have everyone else fooled, but not me.” Clarke continued even as she felt the Commanders breath quicken against her.

“You think you have to be staunch in front of every one you meet, and shut off your feelings because you think they show weakness. I’m here to show you it doesn’t have to be like that.” Clarke realised quickly after her speech that she may have stepped out of line. She didn’t need to anxiously await Lexa’s reply for long however, as it seemed something Clarke said had struck a nerve.

“The last person who said that got their head handed to me on a silver platter Clarke, you would be good to understand that.” Lexa said still through clenched teeth, but the slight tremble in her voice was not lost on Clarke.

Clarke tried not to react to the way her heart pounded when Lexa said her name, and instead focused on the sudden rage she began to feel boiling up inside her.

Leaning impossibly closer it was now Clarke who spoke through clenched teeth.  
“I am not Costia, and you would do well to understand that.” She repeated Lexa’s words.

Clarke was ready to fight on this for hours if she had to, there was no way she was giving up on Lexa. What she wasn’t prepared for was just how soon Lexa was willing to slip out of her façade. In an instant years of age seemed to drip off of Lexa’s face and Clarke recognised that in this moment, she had never seen Lexa so vulnerable or so beautiful.

Clarke wasn’t ready for what happened next as Lexa softly cupped Clarke’s cheek in her palm and ran her thumb along the smooth skin there.

“I know” the Commander said with such reverence it was Clarke’s turn to take a sharp intake of breath.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I apologize for this being so late, it's been a ridiculously busy week for me, your patience is appreciated! Also considering I wasn't sure if I was going to continue this, I'm surprised I managed to push a chapter out.
> 
> Now this may or may not be horrible, hopefully its okay, either way, be gentle :P
> 
> This story has kind of developed to be slightly OOC I guess. It's basically me getting all of my gooeyness out in written form. Also, rating will be changed higher for the next chapter, so if you're not into that, you might as well stop now.
> 
> My tumblr: lexasalicia.tumblr.com

Clarke couldn’t help but lean into the Commanders touch, even though she knew within her heart of hearts that this couldn’t possibly last. Whatever this was, it was a new side of Lexa that she hadn’t seen, her touch was warm and tender, and it shook Clarke to her very core. Even with that in mind, it didn’t stop the Sky Princess from wrapping her arms gently around the Commanders waist.

“You are so strong Clarke, so strong. I am weak for you” The normally strong voice of the Commander wavered as she spoke the last words barely above a whisper into Clarke’s ear.

The brunette gently laid her forehead against the blonde’s while gently rubbing along her nose with her own. Simply enjoying the moment of closeness together.  
The moment didn’t last long however as Clarke could feel the muscles in Lexa’s back begin to tighten once again.

“We can’t.” Lexa breathes out, sounding unconvincing even to her own ears as she begins to back away from their embrace.

“No” Clarke spoke strongly as she tightens her arms around the young leader.  
“You don’t get to do that. There’s no backing out now. We’re too far into this. I’m not letting you leave” 

Clarke then makes a split second decision to press her lips against Lexa’s, effectively stunning the Commander and rendering her speechless and unable to reply.

The kiss soothes the ache that both leaders had never noticed was ever present until it disappeared with the connection of their lips together. It started out soft and tentative, a ghosting of lips against each other, just a whisper of pressure between them, until Lexa let out a low groan from deep in her throat which Clarke felt into her core and it spurs her to open her mouth more fully to pull Lexa’s bottom lip between hers.

Lexa ran her fingers along Clarke’s jaw, rubbing along the back of her neck and then up into her hair, pulling the sky girl impossibly closer into her. 

A shiver then travels down Clarke’s back as she feels Lexa gain control and teasingly run her tongue along the curve of Clarke’s bottom lip, coaxing her into deepening the kiss even more.  
Clarke gives into this and opens her mouth to allow the Commander entrance, as a moan slips from her throat, swallowed by Lexa as their tongues mingle together. 

A new type of ache settles between them that doesn’t go unnoticed, and Clarke is the first to act on it. She gives in to her hunger for closeness and slides her hands down the Commanders chest, down through her open coat and under her shirt to claw over the toned muscles of Lexa’s back, which in turn makes both girls groan at the skin to skin contact with Lexa jolting forward to lean against Clarke, now chest against chest. 

However this only seems to stoke the fire that they both feel inside them until they are nothing but a muddled mess of lips, teeth and hands grabbing at whatever they can get a hold of. Pressing their lower bodies together in an effort to dampen the heat that flows between them.

But all at once it seems, Lexa’s mind is ambushed with thoughts of Clarke in danger, with the Commander helpless to save her. Weakness. Weakness. 

She freezes on the spot, knowing that Clarke will pick up in the slight shift of Lexa’s demeanour, which she does almost immediately.

Clarke is the first to step back and look to Lexa expectantly, but not accusingly. She knows what’s coming next. And she knows just how to deal with it.

Lexa sighs in defeat, her head before her heart, always. Weakness. Weakness. The same word is repeating over in her head. Like a ticking time bomb, slowly driving her insane, but Clarke is the simultaneously the bomb, and the diffuser. 

“I can’-“ Lexa begins only to feel a single finger rested upon her lips, stopping her once again from protesting.

“You have to tell me that I’m not the only one who feels this” Clarke began to speak to her as she stroked her paint-smudged cheek, looking directly into Lexa’s eyes.

Taking a deep breath Lexa answered, “Clarke, of course you are not alone in your feelings. However you are alone in your ignorance. You have to realise the dangers of this.”

Her hands framed Clarke’s face as if it was the most precious thing to her, and she continued, “Every part of my being tells me that you are my priority Clarke. You do not realise the consequences of that. You distract me in a way that no other has ever before, but the duty to protect my people comes first, and in battle I may not always be able to protect you from the enemy. But most of all, I fear that I cannot protect you from myself.”

Clarke notices the drop in Lexa’s features as she says those last words barely above a whisper so she choses her next words carefully, hoping to break the barriers Lexa held up so tightly.

“You don’t have the right to make my choices for me Lexa. I know what is right for me, and right now I know that is you. You can’t push me away, you know I’m the one person you can’t order around, because guess what Commander; I’m not scared of you. I’m not backing down on this.” She looked directly into Lexa’s eyes, challenging the Commander.

Clarke achieved her goal when she could see the look in Lexa’s eyes shift, as if all of the Commanders control that she held so rigidly into place had snapped all at once. And for a split second, Clarke was terrified.

Lexa’s hands reached for the pockets of Clarke’s jacket, roughly pulling the girl towards her so their bodies were flush together as she bent down to breathe into her ear.

“Maybe you could do with a little scaring sky girl”

Lexa could feel Clarke’s breath hitch, signalling for her to continue.

She used her grip on the inside of Clarke’s pockets to flip her around and back her against the planning table that had been behind her a moment ago.

Pushing her hips into the blonde leader in front of her essentially locking her into place she leaned in to run her teeth along Clarke’s neck up to her ear. Lexa felt the blonde shiver and extend her neck up in response, effectively surrendering herself to Lexa’s actions.

“The fear would do you some good” she spoke in a voice lower and huskier than usual that made Clarke’s heart beat faster.

‘Oh I am in some serious trouble now’, Lexa thought to herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ps: pocket pull ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Because I'm a pile of Clexa trash my tumblr is lexasalicia.tumblr.com


End file.
